What do you get up to when you think no-one's looking?

spill...

when i think no one's looking i zone out and think of stuff that makes me laugh or smile, particularly stuff my friends have said, and sit there smirking/grinning uncontrollably which is made worse when i realise that i'm on a goddamn bus or lecture theatre or whatever and there are almost definitely people who can see me. i probably look completely insane, grinning away like a halloween pumpkin and trying not to laugh.

hmm, that was a strange confession. whatever.

I sing.

I do manly bodily function things.
(adjust crotch, clean nose, scratch etc)

I play my Nintendo DS as well.

I daydream too.

I converse with myself in my head.
Sometimes with myself, sometimes with me and another person,
usually someone I know, and make up the responses I think they might give.

Um....

Wallow in depression?

I reckon that's it.

Squeeze blackheads

Clean the sweat in between my boobs (that's when it's hot)

Engage in imaginary conversations (out loud) of all sorts of things. Sometimes I pretend I am working for the UN and doing a speech.

I try to imitate people's voices from TV (I don't do that on purpose, I just find myself repeating something I just heard with the same tone, sometiemes I do it to people I am talking to, it's more embarassing)

If no one is home and I am cooking, I narrate everything I am doing like Im on a cooking show
i sing
i talk to my dog in funny voices

i do shit like pick my nose and scratch my bum even when ppl might be looking

i am essentially an 8 yr old buy trapped in a grown woman's body

i like to take pictures on my phone of random people without them knowing - ugly babies, obvious toupee/wig wearers, someone dressed ghastly. i've never been caught out yet.

general things - adjusting underwear in public, checking make up in parked car wing mirrors. thing is, with all the CCTV now, someone who works in security must be pissing themselves at all the things we think no one else can see us doing.

i like to eat like a pig, with no manners at all, when no ones looking. instead of eating politely, if i'm hungry i'll shove as much food as i can into my mouth & don't care about the stuff that falls out because there's no room left.

Abscess wrote:

i like to take pictures on my phone of random people without them knowing - ugly babies, obvious toupee/wig wearers, someone dressed ghastly. i've never been caught out yet.

general things - adjusting underwear in public, checking make up in parked car wing mirrors. thing is, with all the CCTV now, someone who works in security must be pissing themselves at all the things we think no one else can see us doing.

i like to eat like a pig, with no manners at all, when no ones looking. instead of eating politely, if i'm hungry i'll shove as much food as i can into my mouth & don't care about the stuff that falls out because there's no room left.

\

love the food thing

I'm a closet nose picker for sure. Sometimes blowing won't do, you gotta get a finger up in that situ.

Scratching my arse is a big one. But my arse is itchy lots so I can only really get away with doing one hardcore scratch session per day while at home otherwise my hole would be burning on the constant. I should prolly go to the doc and get more ass-grape cream.


There's stuff I do when people are around and potentially seeing it that I probably shouldn't do, such as picking my spots and sticking my hand down the back of my breeks to get them out of my arse.

Dithyrambic wrote:

If no one is home and I am cooking, I narrate everything I am doing like Im on a cooking show

i do this too LOL

i am also a nosepicker/butt scratcher

I sing

Tlak to myself & my dog

Including narrating to myself things I should be doing & in what order, usually as I'm beginning to do them, in hopes I won;t forget them or the order I need to assign them in the scheme of overall importance *is a control freak*

But I do all this when no one is at home but me, altho I've done it when others WERE here and I didn't realize it at the time. mild omgs "Hon? What are you doing/saying?" events then occur. haha

When I'm driving, I talk to other drivers on the road who commit stupidities, whether I have passengers or not. Alone the lines of 'oh, nice turn signal you fool sarcasm*" "HEY! That was a stop sign, idiot!" "Oh good, a cretin with a death wish; how special!"

That sort of thing. Everyone is used to it by now.

And I totally talk to myself in the mirror ie "Omg Chyia You went out looking like that??" or "cut your hair already, geez!"

I def swear at non-functioning household items such as appliances, as well. And vehicles which suddenly decide to have a prob just when one urgently needs to go somewhere.

Yeah I'm a dork.

Chyia

no one has said wank yet?

i pick my nose in front of people all the time, but when you're alone you get to flick without anyone moaning

i play video games for hours and hours because there's no one to comment on how much of the day i'm "wasting"

i read books aloud to myself. i secretly think i'd make an incredible voice over person, you see

Duchess wrote:

i secretly think i'd make an incredible voice over person, you see

don't we all?

honestly i think i could narrate just about anything

omgexactly

if i don't get a real job soon i might properly look into this voice over thing

this is a recent thing, but ifr im around the house and no ones in and im wearing a dress with no tights i like to pull my underwear down then pull it up again

sundaydress wrote:

this is a recent thing, but ifr im around the house and no ones in and im wearing a dress with no tights i like to pull my underwear down then pull it up again

Thats a bit odd.

Whyyy did you start doing this?

Hoping to be surprised by the tv repair guy?

i have no idea why but its really fun

i sing like i have the vocal chords of Whitney Houston.

i look up weird porn to see if i have a fetish i don't know about.

and i get naked a lot.

sundaydress wrote:

i have no idea why but its really fun

I tried this, wearing sweat pants.

It *is* fun.

i pick my nose, mumble or talk out loud to myself. i'm sure there is more.

when i drive alone i curse at people and call them fucking assholes, etc. "no, i dont think YOU ARE letting me over, cunt"
i'm secretly a psychopath.

Jean-Paul wrote:

when i drive alone i curse at people and call them fucking assholes, etc. "no, i dont think YOU ARE letting me over, cunt"
i'm secretly a psychopath.

I do this too while driving :p

But I do it while I have passengers etc.

I'm not a secret psycho

my mum is ALWAYS shouting at other drivers. i get really annoyed cos if it's just us in the car it's more like she's shouting FUCKING IDIOT at me. s'not like the driver can HEAR her. plus she thinks she's a far superior driver to EVERYONE else on the road and every third car says 'shouldn't be allowed on the fucking road'. she's like the hitler of london traffic.

Come on Duchess, learn to drive too!

So you can be all shouty and superior?


I just found a Metro card in my pocket. Fancy.